You know how you sit down to write and read for a certain post – you start with one thought in your mind and you end up going in a different direction. This is one of those posts. This will be a two-section post.
Proverbs 31:11-12 “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not harm, all the days of her life.”
First: to single ladies: (I myself, being one of those said single women)
1. She does him good all the days of her life. The idea of 24/7. Before she is married – all the days of her life. Most of us live in the “when I get married I will…” (fill in the blank). If it is something good that you could be doing, that if you weren’t doing would bring harm, then you should be doing it now. It doesn’t matter that you aren’t married – how can you do your husband good now – all the days of your life? Serve well, take care of yourself well, pursue Christ well, protect your heart well.
2. Carolyn McCulley says this well in her book Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye: “In our friendships with single men, we can’t presume that any man is the one. We might hope that he will be the one, but only time will unfold God’s plan for us. The woman of noble character, therefore, doesn’t live just in the present, but carefully considers her interactions from the persective of an entire lifetime – and thereby earns the trust of her husband (should God provide), as well as the numerous men who will friends and brothers in the Lord. We have to consider what will bring him gain, or as the NIV translates it, that he lacks nothing of value. This is the bedrock of trust.”
Does your husband, whom you don’t know him yet (as your husband) have your trust? Do you act in such a way that would honor him as your husband, to speak well of your brothers in Christ, to serve them as a sister in Christ would, to encourage them in their walk with the Lord and with the Word of life?
For married women:
As I was reading a book by Elizabeth George this morning on this very passage, I came across a list I wrote in the book. This is why I write in books – so I can go back and be encouraged, hopefully this list will encourage you: ( I wrote this list back in 1998 when I first read this book, I was 21 – thinking I would be married long before I was 34):
1. Open your heart to him. Be honest in your feelings and thoughts.
2. Praise him when he does something you ask him to do (even if its not the exact way you would have done it).
3. Quickly do the things he has asked you to do.
4. Resist the temptation to criticize your husband.
5. Spend quality time with your husband: communicating, laughing, loving.
6. Thank him for being the man of God He called him to be.
7. Unite with him wholly.
8. Value his opinions.
9. Wait on him, don’t make haste judgments.
10. Excel in things he may not do well.
11. Yearn for his love, his companionship.
12. Zealously serve the Lord. In doing that, you will in turn serve your husband.
She brings him good, all the days of her life. As I typed this list, I know who I learned much of that from, especially the last one. I may have wrote those with a naive heart, but those are still true today. May there come a time when I can practice those, but until then…I will do my husband good all the days of my life, and encourage you to do the same.