Friends of mine have a rule to not speak to each other before a certain time in the morning – mainly because I think they aren’t morning people (at least they have learned these things in their marriage). That is somewhat anecdotal – but how many times do our tongues get us into trouble.
My trouble? Always (or a lot of the time) speaking what I think. Sharing my opinion. As of this morning, I think that opinions are overrated. (Didn’t I just share an opinion – I’ve got a long road to recovery!)
Here is why and some guidelines as to whether you should share your opinion or not:
1. Eph 4.29: “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” I won’t even give examples, but use your brain and heart to answer these questions about your opinions that you so are ready to share: 1. Is it corrupting? 2. Will it build up every hearer? 3. Does it fit the occasion? 4. Will it give grace?
2. Deut 30: 14, 19-20a: “But the word is very near you. It is in your mouth and in your heart, so that you can do it. I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and, blessing and curse. Therefore, choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice and holding fast to him.” Again – no examples, just questions: 1. Is what you are about to say a biblically based opinion (of course I’m not talking about mundane things like choosing a restaurant). 2. Will it bring blessing or cursing? 3. Are you being obedient to the Lord in sharing or even having that said opinion?
3. Proverbs 21:2, 23: “Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart. Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” 1. Would the Lord agree with your opinion you are about to share (meaning what is in your heart and why are you sharing it)? 2. What is your heart motivation in sharing your opinion or being heard (often for me it is because of pride and I think I’m right)? 3 Do you daily practice “keeping your tongue”?
After some previous conversations and looking more in depth at these verses and asking these questions – I may do a lot less talking and a lot more listening.