Lavish Hospitality 9

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When people come to our house to spend the night, whether visiting for several days, or just overnight, I like to know what they like and have it for them.

I like to make foods they will eat or a special coffee they will enjoy.  I like to have little gifts ready for them in the room they are staying in.  I want them to feel welcome and loved.  And often times, for most people, gifts make them feel welcome.

This part of hospitality doesn’t have to be extravagant, believe me, hello Dollar Spot at Target!!  The best thing is to be thoughtful.  Preparing your home to be hospitable is an easy task, just be mindful of it.

I know a couple that has a gift room.  They buy things on sale, Black Friday sales, TJMaxx, for just this reason.  To be able to give gifts, or to be able to be hospitable throughout the year through gift-giving.

With Christmas right around the corner, you may have more opportunities to practice this.  Don’t be overwhelmed and don’t stress the budget.  It can be as simple as having your kids draw a picture welcoming them.  Or picking flowers from the yard.  Just something that says welcome.

Quote from Come Thou Long-Expected Jesus (Charles Spurgeon) in a collaboration book by Nancy Guthrie.

Lavish Hospitality 8


As a book reviewer, I’m already receiving books on Christmas, the holidays, and Advent.  This is super helpful because it helps to turn my mind and heart to the real reason for the Christmas season before the hecticness of the holidays work to turn my heart toward other things.

My favorite Christmas album: Sojourn’s Advent Songs. 

My favorite thing to do at Christmas: be at home with just my boys and my man on Christmas day.

My first Christmas stocking: a pale pink ballerina slipper.

My favorite Christmas book: Song of the Stars

Christmas is all about the incarnation.  The incarnation was one of the first acts of Lavish Hospitality.  It is when the Creator of the world came to live in the world he made.  He gave up his wealth to become poor for us.  And in doing so, he welcomed us.

We, as believers, can be such a visible work of the gospel in people’s lives if we welcome them.  Welcome them in their brokenness, in their hurting, in their reality.  And you know what, people don’t enter our perfectness.  They enter our brokenness, our hurting, and our reality.

Quote: Found in Him by Elyse Fitzpatrick.

Lavish Hospitality 7

posted in: 31days, lavish hospitality, marriage | 0

Sorry for the delay, we have been fighting with our internet reception at home.  But, I’m still here.  An update: I want to use this month to get the quotes and start the stories for Lavish Hospitality.  Then use NaNoWriMo to really write it.  I’ll keep you posted.  Thank you for reading.

This past weekend we celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary.  I have found in marriage it is very easy to show grace for the big things, but so much harder for the small things.  One area that my husband and I need to both work on it love: not being easily offended.  When one or both of us have been offended, we are not hospitable to each other.

The other night I just didn’t talk – that is my normal mode of response when I’m hurt.  So, we watched Bull in bed without saying a word.  Turned off the computer and went to bed, all without saying a word.  That is not hospitable.

That is not how we are supposed to act.  Love doesn’t act this way.  I’m not very welcoming to my husband when I don’t even talk to him.

God always need to radically work on my heart when I am offended.

Quote from Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage.

Lavish Hospitality 4

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Tonight at bedtime, doing it solo since my husband was out of town for the day, one kid was screaming in pain because of his tummy the other was pretending he was shooting me and saying he was scared of the dark because he wanted a story in a book read to him.

Not my finest hour – but all ended well.  And now, I’m waiting for my mister to make the trek back from ATL.

Parenting is not for the faint of heart – or yes, maybe it is – and that makes us lean on Christ all the more.  Practicing this type of hospitality at all times of the day is hard – but so necessary.

When we fail though, we can come to our kids and seek their forgiveness and point them to the Father’s unconditional love.

Quote from Sally Clarkson’s book The Mission of Motherhood.  Photograph: kcreatives

Lavish Hospitality 3

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When we are in relationship with other people, the main way we communicate lavish hospitality is by the words we speak.

I’ve learned in marriage that it is more often the little things I say (and how they are said) that cause the most damage.

As a Mom, usually when I am tired and not feeling like I’m in charge, is when the anger comes out and I lash out at my children.

Usually with friendships and relationships, I’m more in control of when and how these things happen and I can back out of the situation to regroup, but I’ve learned so much over the years about how my words (and other’s words) can affect our ability to love well.

I can think of three specific relationships, as an adult, that were totally broken by words.  One was letting a misunderstanding get in the way and cause years of silence.  One was silence instead of fighting for a friendship. One was condemning and has just been healed to the point of being able to talk every now and then.

War of Words is such a helpful book by Paul Tripp, about using our words to communicate the Gospel.  As we invest in those around us, take stock of our relationships, and use our mouths to be instruments of grace, let us first look to our role as reconcilers – not those who destroy.

Lavish Hospitality: 2

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“I gradually began to understand more fully that he was not a problem to be addressed, not the sum of his behavioral performance.  His worth to God was not about his ability to fulfill other people’s expectations or act according to accepted norms.  Instead he was a beloved child of the Father with a specific role to play in God’s ongoing story of redemption.”

Sally ClarksonDifferent


The Fall is a special time for our family.  We celebrate two birthdays and a wedding anniversary within 3 weeks time.

To say that I thrive in parenting would be far from the truth.  I have to tell myself everyday who I am in God’s sight, how He has equipped me to parent the exact boys I’ve been wonderfully given, and how I’m not like all the other moms out there.

When we compare our momselves to other moms – we are not lavishing hospitality – welcoming, grace – on ourselves or our children.  When we play the comparison game, get caught in its trap, we do such a disservice to our hearts.  And that in turn, doesn’t allow us to love our children well either.

To show lavish hospitality to our children is welcoming them just as they are.  Not only when they are obedient, or loving, or going to bed on time.  But, I’ve found for me, when I’m stressed about not being a good mom (because I’ve listened to other things besides the Word of God), I take out my unworthiness on my kids.

Let’s show lavish hospitality to ourselves and our children by staying out of the comparison trap!




Lavish Hospitality: One

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“She recalls wanting to be a part of those experiences,

even is she didn’t yet have a palate for the bitter bean.  

She understood at that moment that in cultures around the world,

life takes place over mugs and french presses.”

Kinfolk Table: Elizabeth Haddad

Hospitality is easy when we are around people we love and who love us and with those with whom we have much in common.  It is harder when we are around strangers, people who are not in harmony with our lives, or those we just don’t know.  Maybe the people we need to pour out grace to are the ones who are least like us.

I’m not a coffee drinker.  Slowly, I’m becoming one, but its like iced coffee with cream and caramel or a sugary frapp from the corner coffee shop.  Maybe if we learn to like things out of our normal sphere (like coffee, or foods we normally wouldn’t eat), we would sharpen our ability to show hospitality.

With my husband: I learn to appreciate classical music.  He learns to appreciate Zac Brown Band and Alabama.  With my boys: I learn all about fire trucks and dinosaurs.

How can you learn to show lavish hospitality by learning to love things you don’t already love?


Write31: Lavish Hospitality (Day 1)

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Day 30

Every October comes around and there is group of women who set out to write a blog a day for the entire month.  Every year I try to do it, and every year I fail.

This year, I’m trying something new.  I’m working on a book (Lavish Hospitality) and want to use this space, this month, to work out the 31 short chapters of the book.

This is not going to be a book about food and blankets and setting up guest rooms.  Yes, partly, there will be some recipes and stuff like this.  But, hospitality is more than just setting a pretty table.

I want to “prepare a space for lavish grace”.  Here the the sub-headings:

To my heart.

To my husband.

To my children.

To my neighbors.

In my home.

In my church.

Grace was poured out lavishly on us.  We need to be ready to pour it out lavishly on others.

Hospitality has a southern ring to is.  You may think of cozy reading corners, mums in the Fall, tea and coffee, flowers and guest rooms.  It can be those things.  But, just because you have coffee set out doesn’t mean you have a welcoming home for others.

So, in the next 30 days I’m going to be sharing 30 quotes and thoughts on them.  These quotes will help me formulate thoughts on this topic, and I hope they will encourage you to practice lavish hospitality in your world.